Full 40 Over 40 Interview - Terri Crothers

Terri Crothers, 58

What's your story? Tell us a little about yourself.

I'm a mom to an amazing 21 year old daughter. I am a middle school art teacher. I have a hippie soul and I'm looking to recapture that carefree feeling with confidence.

What changes or transformations have you experienced?

I've been a mom for 20 years now. My daughter is adopted and was born in China. I raised her by myself and did a damn good job at it. She's successful and about to hit the world stage on her own. I put my life on hold when she came into the picture. Dating and relationships with a potential partner took a back seat. I didn't want to be in a position of bringing someone into my life that might not have been good to my daughter. Putting my life on hold however has had many drawbacks. I'm 58 years old, and I now find myself alone and without a partner to experience this thing called life. I hope to change all of that now.

Unfortunately, I lost both of my parents in 2021, four months apart. I had been a primary caretaker for them during the last five years or so. I wouldn't change a thing, and I have no regrets in the choices I made to be their caretaker. However, just like with having my daughter, I've missed out on finding someone to share my life with. This project has given me some confidence and helped me see my self-worth. I'm ready to jump back into living and caring for myself again.

How has your view of life changed?

I'm not sure my view of life has ever changed significantly over the years. I agree with the phrase about living life to the fullest. Unfortunately I didn't follow that phrase in any way, shape, or form for so many years. I used to be much more of a free spirit and a rebel with a cause. I want to be that woman again and I'm making a conscious effort to see that to fruition. 

Who has been a major source of inspiration or support for you?

My family and my very tight circle of friends have been my biggest supporters. My best friend has been gently nudging me to put myself out there on the dating scene more. My daughter inspires me to want to be a better woman. I want to be the kind of woman she can always look up to and that is a fierce driving force, to be better and stronger and a great example for her.

Why should we see more women over 40 in the media?

Women over 40 have taken a back seat so often when it comes to the media. Actresses over 40 are often relegated to the more matronly and subdued parts of a film or show. Women over 40 that work for the news media are seldom put into positions of being an anchor or in a lead role. If you're a woman with an opinion, and you're over 40, you're often seen as brash or harsh. I say no! Women over 40 are full of wisdom and life that can be vital. We may lose ourselves for a while, but we are more apt to find our way back out again and return better and stronger than before.

What would you say to your 20 (or whatever age) year old self?

Take the chances and live life for all it's worth. Don't be afraid to stand up for what you believe. And for crying out loud, don't wait until you're older to realize that you're a badass and a wonderful force to be reckoned with. 

What is your favorite piece of advice?

Believe in yourself. Don't ever leave behind the woman that you are meant to be. Sometimes you have to be a ballsy broad to make yourself known and heard, and that's okay. Just writing out this interview has helped me realize there is so much I have to work on, and I need to be taking my own advice more often. Someday, at the end of my life, I don't want to be wondering what if I had done things differently.

How has participating in this project changed you?

When I saw my finished photographs, I was blown away at how beautiful I was and at how amazing the photographs turned out. I never had imagined myself as being beautiful. I now know that I am an inspired woman and my free spirit is pushing me every day. I know I can be the main character rather than a spectator.

What would you say to other women who are considering a photoshoot for themselves?

I've talked to women since I completed my photoshoot. I told them it was the most empowering thing I had ever done for myself. Everyone deserves to feel this way about themselves and to be center stage. Go for it and be amazed with yourself!